Letter to Bernardi

Dear Bernardi,

As I stayed up all night packing while you all were studying, I made sure I had everything I possessed. The clothes were the easy part, which basically consisted of me transferring them from drawer to suitcase. The souvenirs were simply enough aside from my constant worrying of weight limits as I added another and another and another… Other essentials, such as my laptop and other electronics, are basically a given and were accounted for since they were unpacked. Though this process was (for all intents and purposes) painless, I rechecked my room more times I wish to disclose.

Something was missing. Yes, I almost forgot my affirmation book but that wasn’t it. I feel like I am missing something big is missing. No, it was not the ten pounds I lost throughout the course of the semester. Well…I did have several jars of peanut butter weighing down my initial luggage but that isn’t it either. I searched the entire house for missing things and after a while, I accepted the fact that I probably didn’t forget anything. Before I knew it, the clock struck 3:00am and I was leaving at 4:45am. I had planned to do this so don’t worry Mom!! (Because I know you’ll read this)

I planned to do a Holy Hour in the middle of the night and 3:00-4:00am seemed like it would make the most sense. I’d be done with packing and writing affirmations for people by then and people weren’t planning on waking up to send me off until 4:15 or so. So there I went into the chapel for possibly my last time ever so that I can spend one of my last hours in Rome and in Bernardi giving thanks to God for all the graces he’s bestowed upon me this semester. As I was praying, I finally realized what I forgot to pack. How could I forget!!

I left all of my spiritual baggage at the door the day I entered this community.

I shared with those around me at dinner this past Wednesday some of my graces from this past semester. I was expressing my mindset before coming to Bernardi. As I put it, “I came to change Bernardi but from the very beginning, I found that Bernardi changed me.” My fellow Bernardians, I truly had the time of my life here in Rome with you but I would be stupid to ignore the fact that every single one of you loved me and helped me open my own heart to allow you all in. I have been reflecting on why God placed me here with you all but that still remains unclear. What I do know is that I fell in love with and felt loved by you all. No words can possibly thank you all enough for what you’ve done for me. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU!!!

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

As I take my Transatlantic voyage back to the United States, I had more than plenty of time to read everything you wrote to me. Through the laughs, the almost tears, the unbelievably kind words and the memories you all shared with me, I have one thing to tell you all: I couldn’t have done it without you. The reason why I was able to smile everyday and express an ounce of joy was because you all reminded me of our eternal reason to be happy!! I believe it was Emily Hoffmann who shared the quote, “How can someone believe redemption if they don’t see a people redeemed?” My lovely friends, you are the people redeemed. Everyday I woke up to a community of people on fire with the love of Christ. Charity was being done left and right. Affirmations were thrown around more often than own actual names. Love poured out of every crevice of our Lungotevere home. When we feasted, we FEASTED. When we celebrated, we CELEBRATED.

How could I ever be anything but happy knowing that I’ll wake up every day for the next four months with people who embody the greatest joy man will ever experience?? All your actions of love were the fuel to my happiness. So really, it is I who should be thanking you!!

Thank You Ladies

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

Where do I even begin with you women? Two quotes come to mind.

Every time I was sitting at a table of all women, Anna would always say, “Brandon. Blessed are you among women.” She couldn’t have said it any better. I really was blessed to be surrounded by you lovely ladies. You all did these small acts of service throughout the semester that were completely unnecessary but made me feel so much more loved. I was flipping through one of my notebooks as I was moving out and I saw at the top of one of the pages, written by one of you, it said, “You are loved.” Your actions were enough to prove that but just seeing that written on the page moved my heart deeper than I can express.

The second quote came from one of the great priests we met this semester. It went something like, “Here, right in front of us, are the 14 most beautiful woman in all of Rome.” Do I even need to explain this further?

Thank you ladies. I am filled to the brim with joy to have you as Sisters in Christ!!

Thank You Seminarians

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

When I was told I was going to be on a floor of 15 seminarians and one former seminarian, I was pretty terrified…I’m not gonna lie!! Though I initially responded with nervousness, flying with you all on the group flight to Rome and when we went to St. Peter’s that first day we arrived quickly eased this fear. Over time, I developed fear of you all for other reasons!! ;)

You are all such holy men. Living in such close proximity with you all really helped me grow as a man and gave me some of the best conversations of my life. You embraced me into the community as if I had been around for years and I greatly appreciated that. Sure, I was woken up sometimes by your getting ready at ungodly hours but that was seriously brought joy to my heart. Being woken up because you were heading to Mass or to do a holy hour was an inspiration if anything!! If these men are going to be the futures leaders of the Holy Catholic Church, I was confidence that our world will soon be filled with more grace than it has use for!!

Thank you for listening to God and responding to his call. You are men of courageous faith!! 

Thank You Fellow Laymen

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

The Few. The Proud. The Laymen.

There were four of you (excluding me) but that didn’t mean your impact on my semester was in any way less then everyone else!! It was a blessing to go through formation with you and to form a fraternity that grew closer as the time passed. All four of you made your love for Christ so evident yet every one of you had a unique difference from the next. No two of us were the same and that brought to life how true fraternity isn’t about common traits but rather common end. We all focused our energy to serve God in our own capacity and that is what brought us together.

I will walk away from this semester understanding what it is to be a man because of you guys. Our conversation will remain at the forefront of my mind all summer if not longer. Your genuine care for me will remain in my heart forever. All the memories we shared have been ingrained into my soul by now.

Thank you for showing the world that a young man can love God regardless of his vocation!! You are some holiest men I know as well. I am honored to have spent this semester will each of you.

So, though I left all that spiritual baggage in Rome, I am bring something even bigger. As I reenter the United States, I am bring back a family of 34 brothers and sister in Christ. If Facebook would allow me, I would list all of you as siblings with the exceptions of Jim and Paul, but only because they don’t have Facebook!

I hope your last final went well!! You can be assured that prayers will be coming your way for as long as I live and if I were made a saint before you all, you can totally count on my intercessions :)

Your Brother in Christ,

Brandon Isaac Miranda

P.S. Since Rome has ended for me; this blog has come to an end as well. Thank you so much for reading my ramblings!! Please pray for me as I try my best to absorb and apply these past four months.

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit; as it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Amen

Reverence: A Virtue To Strive For

I feel the need to apologize before I even begin to write this post. As I have gone through life, I realize that there are many small things (often random things) that really put me on edge. So I warn you reader: this post is spawned of my neurosis over things. 

Now, while I realize that this is something that personally drives me crazy, I know I am not alone in saying that irreverence drives me up a wall sometimes!! I look the Church and I realize that people are at different levels of religious practice but there is most definitely a line. A VERY clear line.

Reverence is defined by Merriam-Webster as:

1 : honor or respect felt or shown : deference; especially :profound adoring awed respect
2 : a gesture of respect (as a bow)
3 : the state of being revered

You are feel to act like a complete fool elsewhere but my target for this post is on the premises of church-grounds. Churches are sacred spaces and should be treated with the utmost respect!! Is that too much to ask? I really do not think I am asking too much.

ANYWAY,  back to the real story. The day was Tuesday, April 30 and I made my way to St. Peter's for Mass like I do often. In this time of year, since people start having spring break and since the temperature is rising, Rome turns into tourist central. People are being turned away at churches all over the city for those tank tops and shorts (Is it wrong that I find pleasure in that?) and cameras are at the ready to shoot towards anything and everything!! Because of this, at 8:30 am, the lines to get into the basilica are already wrapping around the colonnade. Suddenly, going to 9 am Mass at St. Peter's became a task of greater difficulty. 

After it took me 27 minutes to get through the line (yes, I had 3 minutes to get to Mass), I walked with haste to enter the basilica. Right when I enter the majestic doors, I see something that will become the seed for this post. There was this woman and a man who I assume is her boyfriend with their camera at the ready. She was wearing a white fur coat and go-go boots with leggings. I was thinking, "That looks like a strange thing to wear to a church" then she did it. With her head held high and her arms outstretched, she basically did the following as a pose for the picture:

Right as the picture took, a Vatican usher came up to her and said, "Avere un po 'di rispetto. Questo è una chiesa." This translates to "Have a little respect. This is a church." BOOM!! AMEN!! By the way, it is a VERY rare occasion to see a Vatican usher do something like this. They usually just stand around and point at things or scold people for breaking the few rules there are in the basilica, all while kinda forgetting something just an teeny itty bitsy bit important...JESUS LIVES HERE!!!! So I could not help but smile and continue happily on my way when I witnessed this interaction.

Now, I proceeded to Mass to celebrate the death and resurrection of Christ that happens every time a priest says "This is my body" and "This is my blood". This is quite literally the most important thing man can experience on this Earth. This sacred mystery is a prime opportunity to participate in the heavenly reality that can await man if he lives and loves in faith. 

If there was something that I think demands reverence, the Mass would be the first thing that comes to mind. Pope Benedict XVI worked very hard throughout his papacy to show the world how important the liturgy is to the core of our belief. As the Pope Emeritus said in his book Milestones: Memoirs 1927-1977, "I am convinced that the crisis in the Church that we are experiencing today is to a large extent due to the disintegration of the liturgy.” Liturgy is something that we have lost a lot of awe over throughout the years and I believe it's vital to restore it back to the reverent thing it had been!! I have seen vast improvements towards the liturgy throughout my short life but there is definitely room for growth and acceptance of the rite. 

One of my favorite examples of a lacking reverence is Mass in Hispanic culture and in Italian culture. When it comes time for communion, everyone is like:

WHOA!!! Slow your roll people!! There is enough Jesus for everyone to receive!!! Maybe it's just the American in me but going up one pew at a time is very organized and does not cause someone to stray away from the spiritual encounter with Christ by worries of rushing to the front. It is kind of exciting to see how desperate people are to receive Christ in the Eucharist but I think I prefer the organized way more :)

 

The next part of this story from the same day was when I went to the Blessed Sacrament chapel to do a holy hour and...haha. I'm sorry. I need to compose myself even in my writing!! Yes. This story warrants me using improper sentence structures!!

Well, I had to wait outside the chapel briefly because the pews were filled in the chapel which is GREAT!! As I am waiting outside, these tourists from Asia start trying to cut in front of me with cameras in hand. As you can see in the sign above, the Vatican clearly states that "Here is the place exclusively for prayer" and they have added several more languages such as Chinese and other languages I cannot read below the sign. What you cannot see in this picture is a decent sized sign that says in many different languages "No Photo. No Video" with pictures just so the point gets across. I was able to stop some of these tourists from cutting in front of me (mind you, I was first in line) but some managed to slip by me and reach the curtain. It was there that the Vatican usher pulled them back and made them stand behind me. The Vatican usher recognized I am here to pray so he turned to the dozens of tourists behind me and pointed at the signs. He exclaimed "NO PHOTOS" then he allowed us into the chapel. It was evident by their facial expressions and their cameras in hand that they did not understand what he said.

I kneel down at one of the pews and all of the people behind me fill the pew in front of me. As the usher walks out of the chapel, I see that every one of their heads were turned towards him just waiting for him to leave. Within milliseconds the Blessed Sacrament is greeted by paparazzi... 

It takes a saint to not be annoyed but how irreverent people can be in sacred space. I can tolerate people letting their cellphones ring during Mass or letting their children roam freely throughout the church or people falling asleep without even trying to stay awake or people expressing their dislike for the priest or filling churches with hideous multi-colored banners saying "All Are Welcome" or even taking pictures like this...

Photo credit: Emily Seitz

but I cannot and will not tolerate you disrespecting the exposed Jesus Christ in the Blessed Sacrament of the Altar!! The Vatican is extremely kind to let you take a picture of every square inch of the basilica EXCEPT the Blessed Sacrament chapel. This are is reserved for prayer and adoration of Christ. This area is meant for the pilgrim to come in and praise the living God. This area is meant to remain in silence and hear the voice of God speak to your heart. Many saints and holy people have been converted or have heard their callings while adoring the Blessed Sacrament. This is something more special than what words can describe. This right here is what defines the Church and what keeps me believing every single day!! The Eucharist is something that must be cherished, protected and respected at all costs!! Please by more like the picture below:

Again, is that too much to ask? I really do not think it is anywhere near too much to ask!

Reading my blog, you'll realize I go on tangents on occasion...Back to the story!! Then Vatican usher came back into the room within seconds, walked over to the people sitting in front of me and said in English, "Everyone sitting in this row. Get your things and leave immediately. I already told you this was against the rules." With that, the tourists filed out and the chapel was at peace again. 

I'm sorry if I come off as mean or angry in this post but it is sometimes necessary for me to express how important the presence of the Eucharist has to be to every person entering a church. I may be a tiny bit crazy but I am not wrong to defend the precious thing I know in my life. Just think about what happened when Jesus encountered people in the temple for the wrong purposes:

"Jesus entered the temple area and drove out all those engaged in selling and buying there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the seats of those who were selling doves. And he said to them, “It is written: 

‘My house shall be a house of prayer,’
but you are making it a den of thieves.”" - Matthew 21:12

Though I do not think Jesus would cast out the tourist from the basilica, he shows anger in the fact that people are misusing a place meant to worship Our Father. Even at this, I am not angry at the picture-snapping tourists. When I look deep into my heart, I am saddened by these people. They come in such close proximity to Christ and they see only the aesthetic beauty of the chapel. They take these pictures because everything around them is adorned with bronze and marble but I truly wonder if they consider why. Why did these Catholics decorate this room with so many expensive and beautiful things?

That is why. The King of kings, the Light in darkness, the Name above all names, the Refuge for sinners, the Son of Man is present in that chapel. Christ himself is in the Eucharist. He is there in that tabernacle. Reverence is the least we can show him.