Letter to Bernardi

Dear Bernardi,

As I stayed up all night packing while you all were studying, I made sure I had everything I possessed. The clothes were the easy part, which basically consisted of me transferring them from drawer to suitcase. The souvenirs were simply enough aside from my constant worrying of weight limits as I added another and another and another… Other essentials, such as my laptop and other electronics, are basically a given and were accounted for since they were unpacked. Though this process was (for all intents and purposes) painless, I rechecked my room more times I wish to disclose.

Something was missing. Yes, I almost forgot my affirmation book but that wasn’t it. I feel like I am missing something big is missing. No, it was not the ten pounds I lost throughout the course of the semester. Well…I did have several jars of peanut butter weighing down my initial luggage but that isn’t it either. I searched the entire house for missing things and after a while, I accepted the fact that I probably didn’t forget anything. Before I knew it, the clock struck 3:00am and I was leaving at 4:45am. I had planned to do this so don’t worry Mom!! (Because I know you’ll read this)

I planned to do a Holy Hour in the middle of the night and 3:00-4:00am seemed like it would make the most sense. I’d be done with packing and writing affirmations for people by then and people weren’t planning on waking up to send me off until 4:15 or so. So there I went into the chapel for possibly my last time ever so that I can spend one of my last hours in Rome and in Bernardi giving thanks to God for all the graces he’s bestowed upon me this semester. As I was praying, I finally realized what I forgot to pack. How could I forget!!

I left all of my spiritual baggage at the door the day I entered this community.

I shared with those around me at dinner this past Wednesday some of my graces from this past semester. I was expressing my mindset before coming to Bernardi. As I put it, “I came to change Bernardi but from the very beginning, I found that Bernardi changed me.” My fellow Bernardians, I truly had the time of my life here in Rome with you but I would be stupid to ignore the fact that every single one of you loved me and helped me open my own heart to allow you all in. I have been reflecting on why God placed me here with you all but that still remains unclear. What I do know is that I fell in love with and felt loved by you all. No words can possibly thank you all enough for what you’ve done for me. THANK YOU. THANK YOU. THANK YOU!!!

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

As I take my Transatlantic voyage back to the United States, I had more than plenty of time to read everything you wrote to me. Through the laughs, the almost tears, the unbelievably kind words and the memories you all shared with me, I have one thing to tell you all: I couldn’t have done it without you. The reason why I was able to smile everyday and express an ounce of joy was because you all reminded me of our eternal reason to be happy!! I believe it was Emily Hoffmann who shared the quote, “How can someone believe redemption if they don’t see a people redeemed?” My lovely friends, you are the people redeemed. Everyday I woke up to a community of people on fire with the love of Christ. Charity was being done left and right. Affirmations were thrown around more often than own actual names. Love poured out of every crevice of our Lungotevere home. When we feasted, we FEASTED. When we celebrated, we CELEBRATED.

How could I ever be anything but happy knowing that I’ll wake up every day for the next four months with people who embody the greatest joy man will ever experience?? All your actions of love were the fuel to my happiness. So really, it is I who should be thanking you!!

Thank You Ladies

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

Where do I even begin with you women? Two quotes come to mind.

Every time I was sitting at a table of all women, Anna would always say, “Brandon. Blessed are you among women.” She couldn’t have said it any better. I really was blessed to be surrounded by you lovely ladies. You all did these small acts of service throughout the semester that were completely unnecessary but made me feel so much more loved. I was flipping through one of my notebooks as I was moving out and I saw at the top of one of the pages, written by one of you, it said, “You are loved.” Your actions were enough to prove that but just seeing that written on the page moved my heart deeper than I can express.

The second quote came from one of the great priests we met this semester. It went something like, “Here, right in front of us, are the 14 most beautiful woman in all of Rome.” Do I even need to explain this further?

Thank you ladies. I am filled to the brim with joy to have you as Sisters in Christ!!

Thank You Seminarians

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

When I was told I was going to be on a floor of 15 seminarians and one former seminarian, I was pretty terrified…I’m not gonna lie!! Though I initially responded with nervousness, flying with you all on the group flight to Rome and when we went to St. Peter’s that first day we arrived quickly eased this fear. Over time, I developed fear of you all for other reasons!! ;)

You are all such holy men. Living in such close proximity with you all really helped me grow as a man and gave me some of the best conversations of my life. You embraced me into the community as if I had been around for years and I greatly appreciated that. Sure, I was woken up sometimes by your getting ready at ungodly hours but that was seriously brought joy to my heart. Being woken up because you were heading to Mass or to do a holy hour was an inspiration if anything!! If these men are going to be the futures leaders of the Holy Catholic Church, I was confidence that our world will soon be filled with more grace than it has use for!!

Thank you for listening to God and responding to his call. You are men of courageous faith!! 

Thank You Fellow Laymen

Photo credit: Emma Voelker

The Few. The Proud. The Laymen.

There were four of you (excluding me) but that didn’t mean your impact on my semester was in any way less then everyone else!! It was a blessing to go through formation with you and to form a fraternity that grew closer as the time passed. All four of you made your love for Christ so evident yet every one of you had a unique difference from the next. No two of us were the same and that brought to life how true fraternity isn’t about common traits but rather common end. We all focused our energy to serve God in our own capacity and that is what brought us together.

I will walk away from this semester understanding what it is to be a man because of you guys. Our conversation will remain at the forefront of my mind all summer if not longer. Your genuine care for me will remain in my heart forever. All the memories we shared have been ingrained into my soul by now.

Thank you for showing the world that a young man can love God regardless of his vocation!! You are some holiest men I know as well. I am honored to have spent this semester will each of you.

So, though I left all that spiritual baggage in Rome, I am bring something even bigger. As I reenter the United States, I am bring back a family of 34 brothers and sister in Christ. If Facebook would allow me, I would list all of you as siblings with the exceptions of Jim and Paul, but only because they don’t have Facebook!

I hope your last final went well!! You can be assured that prayers will be coming your way for as long as I live and if I were made a saint before you all, you can totally count on my intercessions :)

Your Brother in Christ,

Brandon Isaac Miranda

P.S. Since Rome has ended for me; this blog has come to an end as well. Thank you so much for reading my ramblings!! Please pray for me as I try my best to absorb and apply these past four months.

Glory be to the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit; as it was in the beginning, is now, and ever shall be, world without end. Amen

Reverence: A Virtue To Strive For

I feel the need to apologize before I even begin to write this post. As I have gone through life, I realize that there are many small things (often random things) that really put me on edge. So I warn you reader: this post is spawned of my neurosis over things. 

Now, while I realize that this is something that personally drives me crazy, I know I am not alone in saying that irreverence drives me up a wall sometimes!! I look the Church and I realize that people are at different levels of religious practice but there is most definitely a line. A VERY clear line.

Reverence is defined by Merriam-Webster as:

1 : honor or respect felt or shown : deference; especially :profound adoring awed respect
2 : a gesture of respect (as a bow)
3 : the state of being revered

You are feel to act like a complete fool elsewhere but my target for this post is on the premises of church-grounds. Churches are sacred spaces and should be treated with the utmost respect!! Is that too much to ask? I really do not think I am asking too much.

ANYWAY,  back to the real story. The day was Tuesday, April 30 and I made my way to St. Peter's for Mass like I do often. In this time of year, since people start having spring break and since the temperature is rising, Rome turns into tourist central. People are being turned away at churches all over the city for those tank tops and shorts (Is it wrong that I find pleasure in that?) and cameras are at the ready to shoot towards anything and everything!! Because of this, at 8:30 am, the lines to get into the basilica are already wrapping around the colonnade. Suddenly, going to 9 am Mass at St. Peter's became a task of greater difficulty. 

After it took me 27 minutes to get through the line (yes, I had 3 minutes to get to Mass), I walked with haste to enter the basilica. Right when I enter the majestic doors, I see something that will become the seed for this post. There was this woman and a man who I assume is her boyfriend with their camera at the ready. She was wearing a white fur coat and go-go boots with leggings. I was thinking, "That looks like a strange thing to wear to a church" then she did it. With her head held high and her arms outstretched, she basically did the following as a pose for the picture:

Right as the picture took, a Vatican usher came up to her and said, "Avere un po 'di rispetto. Questo è una chiesa." This translates to "Have a little respect. This is a church." BOOM!! AMEN!! By the way, it is a VERY rare occasion to see a Vatican usher do something like this. They usually just stand around and point at things or scold people for breaking the few rules there are in the basilica, all while kinda forgetting something just an teeny itty bitsy bit important...JESUS LIVES HERE!!!! So I could not help but smile and continue happily on my way when I witnessed this interaction.

Now, I proceeded to Mass to celebrate the death and resurrection of Christ that happens every time a priest says "This is my body" and "This is my blood". This is quite literally the most important thing man can experience on this Earth. This sacred mystery is a prime opportunity to participate in the heavenly reality that can await man if he lives and loves in faith. 

If there was something that I think demands reverence, the Mass would be the first thing that comes to mind. Pope Benedict XVI worked very hard throughout his papacy to show the world how important the liturgy is to the core of our belief. As the Pope Emeritus said in his book Milestones: Memoirs 1927-1977, "I am convinced that the crisis in the Church that we are experiencing today is to a large extent due to the disintegration of the liturgy.” Liturgy is something that we have lost a lot of awe over throughout the years and I believe it's vital to restore it back to the reverent thing it had been!! I have seen vast improvements towards the liturgy throughout my short life but there is definitely room for growth and acceptance of the rite. 

One of my favorite examples of a lacking reverence is Mass in Hispanic culture and in Italian culture. When it comes time for communion, everyone is like:

WHOA!!! Slow your roll people!! There is enough Jesus for everyone to receive!!! Maybe it's just the American in me but going up one pew at a time is very organized and does not cause someone to stray away from the spiritual encounter with Christ by worries of rushing to the front. It is kind of exciting to see how desperate people are to receive Christ in the Eucharist but I think I prefer the organized way more :)

 

The next part of this story from the same day was when I went to the Blessed Sacrament chapel to do a holy hour and...haha. I'm sorry. I need to compose myself even in my writing!! Yes. This story warrants me using improper sentence structures!!

Well, I had to wait outside the chapel briefly because the pews were filled in the chapel which is GREAT!! As I am waiting outside, these tourists from Asia start trying to cut in front of me with cameras in hand. As you can see in the sign above, the Vatican clearly states that "Here is the place exclusively for prayer" and they have added several more languages such as Chinese and other languages I cannot read below the sign. What you cannot see in this picture is a decent sized sign that says in many different languages "No Photo. No Video" with pictures just so the point gets across. I was able to stop some of these tourists from cutting in front of me (mind you, I was first in line) but some managed to slip by me and reach the curtain. It was there that the Vatican usher pulled them back and made them stand behind me. The Vatican usher recognized I am here to pray so he turned to the dozens of tourists behind me and pointed at the signs. He exclaimed "NO PHOTOS" then he allowed us into the chapel. It was evident by their facial expressions and their cameras in hand that they did not understand what he said.

I kneel down at one of the pews and all of the people behind me fill the pew in front of me. As the usher walks out of the chapel, I see that every one of their heads were turned towards him just waiting for him to leave. Within milliseconds the Blessed Sacrament is greeted by paparazzi... 

It takes a saint to not be annoyed but how irreverent people can be in sacred space. I can tolerate people letting their cellphones ring during Mass or letting their children roam freely throughout the church or people falling asleep without even trying to stay awake or people expressing their dislike for the priest or filling churches with hideous multi-colored banners saying "All Are Welcome" or even taking pictures like this...

Photo credit: Emily Seitz

but I cannot and will not tolerate you disrespecting the exposed Jesus Christ in the Blessed Sacrament of the Altar!! The Vatican is extremely kind to let you take a picture of every square inch of the basilica EXCEPT the Blessed Sacrament chapel. This are is reserved for prayer and adoration of Christ. This area is meant for the pilgrim to come in and praise the living God. This area is meant to remain in silence and hear the voice of God speak to your heart. Many saints and holy people have been converted or have heard their callings while adoring the Blessed Sacrament. This is something more special than what words can describe. This right here is what defines the Church and what keeps me believing every single day!! The Eucharist is something that must be cherished, protected and respected at all costs!! Please by more like the picture below:

Again, is that too much to ask? I really do not think it is anywhere near too much to ask!

Reading my blog, you'll realize I go on tangents on occasion...Back to the story!! Then Vatican usher came back into the room within seconds, walked over to the people sitting in front of me and said in English, "Everyone sitting in this row. Get your things and leave immediately. I already told you this was against the rules." With that, the tourists filed out and the chapel was at peace again. 

I'm sorry if I come off as mean or angry in this post but it is sometimes necessary for me to express how important the presence of the Eucharist has to be to every person entering a church. I may be a tiny bit crazy but I am not wrong to defend the precious thing I know in my life. Just think about what happened when Jesus encountered people in the temple for the wrong purposes:

"Jesus entered the temple area and drove out all those engaged in selling and buying there. He overturned the tables of the money changers and the seats of those who were selling doves. And he said to them, “It is written: 

‘My house shall be a house of prayer,’
but you are making it a den of thieves.”" - Matthew 21:12

Though I do not think Jesus would cast out the tourist from the basilica, he shows anger in the fact that people are misusing a place meant to worship Our Father. Even at this, I am not angry at the picture-snapping tourists. When I look deep into my heart, I am saddened by these people. They come in such close proximity to Christ and they see only the aesthetic beauty of the chapel. They take these pictures because everything around them is adorned with bronze and marble but I truly wonder if they consider why. Why did these Catholics decorate this room with so many expensive and beautiful things?

That is why. The King of kings, the Light in darkness, the Name above all names, the Refuge for sinners, the Son of Man is present in that chapel. Christ himself is in the Eucharist. He is there in that tabernacle. Reverence is the least we can show him.

Polak and Polka: A Cracovian Love Story

Before I left, a friend asked me why I want to go to Poland of all places. My answer was one a child would probably give: I like Polish people. The next question was how many Polish people I knew. So here you have it folks:

1. Pope John Paul II
2. Saint Maximilian Kolbe
3. Saint Faustina Kowalska
4. Dr. George Woytanowitz (history professor at St. Thomas)
5. "Big Mike"
6. Agnieszka "Aga" Lula
7. Justin Wiltse (fellow Bernardian)

And that is the extent of Poles that I know. Hmm...why do I love Poland? Could it be the food? Pierogi, kielbasa, zurek soup...what's there not to love? But no, that can't be the reason either. Ah!! I remember why I love Poland. According to statistics from 2007,"88.4% of the population belonged to the Catholic Church" (Wikipedia). I mean, how could you not be that Catholic when then Cardinal Karol Józef Wojtyła, now known as Blessed Pope John Paul II, was Archbishop of Krakow? Just read his address to the then Communist Poland in 1979:

"To Poland the Church brought Christ, the key to understanding that great and fundamentalreality that is man. For man cannot be fully understood without Christ. Or rather, man is incapable of understanding himself fully without Christ. He cannot understand who he is, nor what his true dignity is, nor what his vocation is, nor what his final end is. He cannot understand any of this without Christ.
Therefore Christ cannot be kept out of the history of man in any part of the globe, at any longitude or latitude of geography. The exclusion of Christ from the history of man is an act against man. Without Christ it is impossible to understand the history of Poland, especially the history of the people who have passed or are passing through this land. The history of people. The history of the nation is above all the history of people. And the history of each person unfolds in Jesus Christ. In him it becomes the history of salvation." (Vatican.va) 

 

 After delivering this to the Polish people, they started to heed the words of scripture repeated over one hundred times: "Be not afraid." They went into their workplaces, their homes, and in the public square to proclaim the truth of Christ in their live. With that, Poland's communist grasp weakened significantly and eventually weakened the rest of the Slovak area, in turn weakening the USSR. The rest is history.

The one thing I loved most about Krakow was the amount of Catholic churches and the outward piety of the city's people. The city basically basically had a Mass schedule comparable to that of Rome. People were always at Mass and even the Cathedral guards were practicing Catholics, as evident by them serving Mass, reading at Mass and genuflecting before the Blessed Sacrament before entering the Adoration Chapel. If I could speak Polish, I would 100% move to Krakow and live there for the rest of my life!! There is something about a Catholic society that wins my heart over EVERY single time.

Some of the churches we visited were jaw-droppingly beautiful. Built in the classical style, the decor was much more "Here live God; come and behold Him!" rather than the modern "We worship God here; look at my decorating skills! Supes cute!" (Too far? I think not...). The reverence displayed by the Poles in their church design and church-going is something I wish every Catholic would heed. Along with these stunning churches, the Adoration Chapels where truly built for royal to given proper respect to the King of Kings. It is a Catholic paradise in Poland!!

Speaking of paradise, SNOW. LOTS of snow!! When we were descending into KRA (JPII International Airport), we were delayed by 15 minutes and forced to fly around in the air because they had to clear the runway of snow. With temperatures around the 28° to 36° range, I was able to experience the winter I missed this year. Luckily for me, I checked the forecast before leaving Rome and brought my Columbia Omniheat jacket to ensure I am toasty warm the whole time!! There is something about an all-white backdrop to beautiful church architecture which can soften my heart no matter how hard it may have become from churches like this and this and this or dare I say this one. Sometimes conserving what is beautiful is better than creating something new and beautiful (Most times I'd say). 

Anyway, back to snow!! Though it was freezing cold in the churches when we went to Mass, it was a blessing to have these cold temperatures following me around for the week. It made me remember why I fell in love with Minnesota :)

This an abrupt change but while we were in Poland, we went to visit Auschwitz and the neighboring Auschwitz-Birkenau. Hitler's Holocaust of the Jewish people was one that will stain history for countless years to come. I have always had an interest in the time period during Second War World and this trip brought all these horrific events back into my mind. It was very difficult at times to see rooms filled with confiscated shoes, luggage, glasses and literal tons of human hair. My heart ached for all the innocent lives that were lost to this horrible Nazi cause. All that was described to us was unimaginable but despite the sadness that me heart felt, I was able to see light at the end of a long tunnel.

On part of the tour, we had the opportunity to visit Block 11 where there were starvation cells. It is in this building that both Pope John Paul II and Pope Benedict XVI came to pray at one particular cell. If my memory serves me correctly, it was in Cell 18 where St. Maximilian Kolbe, a Polish Franciscan priest and one of my favorite saints, was martyred after starving to death along with 10 other men. His story is a very sad one but one should not overlook the fact that he did not died in vain but out of the love of Christ. Saint Maximilian Kolbe chose to enter that cell in the place of this father with children who was initially selected. This martyr of the love of Christ is an inspiration and a call to all Christians to agape, or the total gift of self through love.

Saint Maximilian Kolbe's story is not unique either. There were many people interned in these concentration camps who hoped to the point of death and lived to love. Many lost their lives but gained eternity with God for having faith in him and never giving up hope in the face of certain death. Those who can see love even in these most volatile conditions brought me hope. I am not sure I could have that strength but how I pray that if I was in their place and I can still see hope at every moment.

It was certainly a spiritual experience as much as a historical experience to visit Auschwitz. I will not forget the things that I saw there for the rest of my life and I will always heed the call given by those who died in the hope of rising to new life after death. They are a true inspiration.

I apologize for the sudden change of topic yet again. Poland was filled with completely unique experience and it's a shame to bunch them together in one post. Yet, everything is connected by the common thread of this penultimate topic. On Sunday of that week, we made our way further outside of Krakow to the world renowned Divine Mercy Sanctuary established by Blessed Pope John Paul II in 2002. While the Sanctuary itself was...interesting...the message of Christ to St. Faustina is one that should resonate in our lives. For those unfamiliar with the Divine Mercy Devotion, EWTN uses these words:

"Devotion to The Divine Mercy involves a total commitment to
God as Mercy. It is a decision to trust completely in Him, to
accept His mercy with thanksgiving, and to be merciful as
He is merciful."
Read more:http://www.ewtn.com/devotionals/mercy/backgr.htm#ixzz2R059Gndy

This devotion has become increasing popular in the United States and around the world over time, especially after Blessed John Paul II started to actively promote it following his canonization of St. Faustina in 2000. That say year, Pope John Paul II declared the First Sunday after Easter as the Sunday of Divine Mercy, according to what is specified in the diary of St. Faustina. Because of this ever growing devotion, a lot of people flock to he tomb and to the Sanctuary.

I will tell you with all my experience with papal events and conclaves, the crowds at Divine Mercy Sunday are INTENSE. I have never experienced that much pushing and "sardine-ing" (Definition: when a group of people actively try to imitate the compact nature of sardines) in a liturgical setting. The either Mass was in Polish but I was still able to participate partially because the Kyrie, Gloria, Sanctus, and Agnus Dei were sung in Latin by the choirs present. It was a great experience but I NEVER plan on doing it again...unless, of course, I have some VIP access or something.

After some shopping at religious goods booths, prayer at the tomb of St. Faustina, praying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy during the hour of Divine Mercy on site, and eating some Polish food from a street vendor, we finally made our way to find a taxi to take us to the airport. Much to our surprise, the taxi driver was a kind/funny man who gave us a history of Poland as we drove to KRA and told us about his daughters whom he loves very much.

Our last surprise of Poland was at the airport itself. As we were waiting for our flight to eventually come, I spotted signs for the airport chapel. Having bad experiences with other airport chapels in the US, I was hesitate to see this one. I was half expecting a picture of Jesus next to Buddha next to Ganesha, the Hindu god of knowledge, wisdom and wealth.

But nope! Instead I found a crucifix placed above the Blessed Sacrament with a pilot praying before embarking on his flight. That propeller in the corner has a considerable amount of rosaries hanging off of it and there was a Mass schedule posted by the door. Only in a Catholic country can I be blessed with such a surprise!!

There you have it folks!! There was my experience in Krakow, Poland: the city that stole my heart.

Schönstatt: German for "Beautiful Place"

In order to tell this story, I am not entirely sure that there can be a beginning. It is a common trend for me to get way over my head on how to express my experiences but I will try my best for my readers. So, my beginning will be Christ and my story will be his Most Holy Mother, Mary. 

For anyone who knows me and is interested in my spiritual life, I am more than willing to share the story about my miraculous rosary. Years ago, as I was growing more and more into my faith, I had a desire to start praying the rosary again. When I searched around my house, I discovered that all I had were those cheap plastic rosaries that you can buy in bundles. Who would ever want to pray with this cheap plastic thing? I understand that the rosary is a rosary but coming back into the faith initially was leaning towards the grandeur of God. I prayed with that plastic rosary but I continued looking for rosaries in the meantime. Everything I found online was quite expensive and I quickly got discouraged. Eventually, after a week or so, I gave up and prayed to God that I must accept what I have and if something better came my way, I will praise God for this miracle. I surrendered my desire for something better and embraced whatever the Lord wanted from me.

Well, my lovely and beautiful friend, Anne Lahola, came back from a pilgrimage to Medjugorje and when I saw her she said, "Walk with me. I have a present for you." She continued on to tell me about her time in Medjugorje and how it was magnificent. Then she pulled out a rosary:

This rosary from Medjugorje was made at a house for boys who have dependency issues such as playing too much video games, drinking too much, eating too much etc. The beads are called "Job's Tears" which are actually seeds that naturally grow with a hole through it. Both Mother Theresa and Pope John Paul II had rosaries made with these seeds. Now, the crucifix is what got me. This crucifix is unique from any I've seen before because instead of just having Jesus dying on the Cross, Mary is standing at her son's side catching his blood in a chalice. This crucifix not only reminded me of what Jesus did for me through his death but also illuminated the fact that Mary was at the foot of his Cross and accepted that it was God's will that her child was to die in front of her to save humanity from the grips of Hell. She embraced this sorrow and sacrifice with love and faith. She accepted what the Lord gave her and praised for all the miracles she was presented with. 

It was at receiving this gift that I realized that this was not a gift from Anne but a gift from God himself. He gave me my miracle which I prayed for just days beforehand. For the past five or so years, I have been carrying this rosary in my back pocket and every time I pray with it, I praise God for giving me tangible proof of his existence through this rosary. 

Now wait for the kicker... I started to make rosaries and I struggled to find crucifixes for them all. When I had finally given up my search for finding some that I liked, I stumbled upon St. Joseph's Mail Ordered Rosary Parts (http://www.stjosephsmailorder.com) which has the best selection of rosary parts I've ever found online!! Anyway, wanna guess which crucifix I found and ordered? Out of hundreds of websites, I never saw that crucifix until I found this website. Even until now, I still order parts from this website.

Again, last year I was looking for a wall crucifix and I was able to find one with the Jesus and Mary on it. I basically devoted my life to this crucifix and its meaning because it spoke to me twice already when I reached a dead end. I took this cross and learned to fall deeper in love with Christ and his suffering but perfect mother. 

Well, I promised you a kicker!! I decided to go on a trip to Schönstatt with Nathan Schuster, a seminarian from the Archdiocese of St. Paul-Minneapolis, though I knew absolutely nothing about this place besides that it was in Germany. To be honest, I was kind of nervous that I won't enjoy the trip to this small town but I committed anyways. A couple of days before we were to depart, he was looking at the website for Schönstatt and I saw a picture of that crucifix and I said, "Hey!! I know that crucifix. It's basically my favorite!!" He kind of laughed and then said, "Well, it is kind of one of the major symbols of Schönstatt."(http://www.schoenstatt.org/en/about-schoenstatt/unity-cross-in-schoenstatt.htm) [If you care to learn more about it] MIND. BLOWN.

This crucifix, which is named the "Unity Cross", had shaped a lot of my reversion back to the faith and I was unknowingly going to the place were it basically has its home. If that isn't Divine Providence, I don't know what is!! Now onward....

This is the symbol of Schönstatt

Schönstatt is a small community located near Vallendar, Germany which is about ten minutes away from Koblenz. Buried in the hills, one would not suspect it was the center of a thriving Marian movement, well...besides the fact that there are Schönstatt Sisters walking on the pathways everywhere. I'm not going to lie, everything was a hike and half to get places but I got use to it after a while. After waking up at 4:30am, getting to the airport at 6am for our 8am flight, having the flight delayed until 11am, getting to Germany to discover we barely missed the bus, then finally getting to Schönstatt several hours after we were expected to arrive, I wanted nothing more than sleep. We were situated in the guesthouses ran by the Brothers of Mary and made our way to Mass in German. It was hard to focus and be prayerful especially since it I know next to zero German. We went back up the GIANT hill, ate dinner then Brother Marcus just us a brief tour of an exhibit of some heroes of Schönstatt. Through his broken English, I was still able to gather that I was in for the weekend of my life. Then sleep befell me.

The Original Shrine

The next morning, we went to the "Original Shrine" that is the source of the movement. I kid you not, this shrine holds a maximum of 20 or so people. It is no bigger than the average garden shed. Yet, this shrine is where the movement began and now there are over 275 shrines identical to this one scattered throughout the world, with the exception of two (both in the US). If there is one word to describe this chapel, it 100,000% would be "intimate". Now what is this all centered on you ask? Let me tell you. Most of my information comes from our tour guide, Sister Margarita from Puerto Rico who spoken English like someone from Florida. She was an absolute sweetheart :)

As I said, my story is Mary. This movement all started because Fr. Kentenich, the founder, was giving to task of being a spiritual director to these rowdy, trouble-making boys at a pre-seminary. These kids wouldn't listen so he prayed about it and came but with a solution. He presented the boys with an opportunity to become real men who are warriors, conquerors and victors!! What boy wouldn't want that? He asked them, not forced them, to devote their entire life to Christ by, for, with and in Mary, his Most Holy Mother. The image above, the "Mother Thrice Admirable" is part of every altarpiece in every Schönstatt shrine. You'd think these boys may be rebellious but very soon after, all the boys did everything for their Mother. Many of these boys were drafted into the First World War under Germany and every military medal they received, they would bring it back to the Shrine and give it to Mary as a sign of their bravery and courage for her sake. Many of these boys died in the war but all of them died knowing the love of Christ through his Mother.

I could go all day talking about this but I must move on!! If you want to learn more, you can contact me somehow if you'd like or wait to we see each other in person. Addiamo...

We then continued up a hill to get to the Church of the Blessed Trinity on Mount Schönstatt, which was the church Fr. Kentenich commission in the 1960's to be the main church building. The hike was as bad as the last one but I didn't even notice because I was in Heaven!!! Schönstatt had already stolen my heart away early that day. The entire walk, Sister Margarita continued to tell us more history about the movement and got to know us more. 

I will be the first to say that I'm not a huge fan on modern church design. The Renaissance, Gothic and Baroque styles of architecture were absolutely stunning. They are transcendant and what I recognize as true art. I don't make this exception often but this church was different. Though it was incredibly modern, Fr. Kentenich (basically, this man is a saint) designed the church to be transcendant once you fully comprehend the details he gave to it. I made the picture bigger so you can see this cross. This cross has so many small details about it that make it go from "oh..." to "ahhhh...." if you get what I'm saying. That skylight is actually the only light source for the entire church during the day. The tabernacle is dead-centered which is an infinite plus in my book. Very simple but transcendant.

Fr. Kentenich died in 1968 from a heart attack as he was unvesting in the sacristy after saying Mass. His tomb is sitting in there and people are surrounding it prayer. Though he died 45 years ago, the movement continues to build momentum. His cause for beatification is open along with two other members of Schönstatt. 

The entire experience was a blessing from God. Even a few weeks later, I'm still not sure what happened in my heart while I was there. All I know is that Mary with take you in as her child to bring you to salvation through her Son. 

As it says in John 19:26-27, "When Jesus then saw His mother, and the disciple whom He loved standing nearby, He said to His mother, "Woman, behold, your son!" Then He said to the disciple, "Behold, your mother!" From that hour the disciple took her into his own household."

This is the call of Christ in our lives. He tells us to take Mary into our lives, into our households, and glorify Him for his ultimate sacrifice and the redemption of our souls.

Come, O Holy Spirit! Fill the hearts of Thy faithful and enkindle in us the fire of Thy love!

The Coronation of Pope Francis (How I wish...)

Before I give you a recap of the Inauguration Mass, let me go on my rant. Since I heard of Benedict's resignation, I have been half joking about how I want the next pope to bring back the papal tiara. HALF joking is not the term I should be using. NOT joking is more like it. Hearing of Pope Francis' humble ways, I knew my dream will have to wait but I will slowly accept that. Doesn't make me love him less!!

Photo Credit: http://orbiscatholicussecundus.blogspot.it/2012/04/paul-in-tiara.html

With the election of Pope John Paul I in 1978, he decided to discontinue the practice of having a "Papal Coronation Mass" which is now "Investitures Mass". This tradition started in the 8th century and the last pope to use the tiara was Venerable Pope Paul VI (depicted above) who was the pope during the Second Vatican Council. It was there where he "descended the steps of the papal throne in St. Peter's Basilica and ascended to the altar, on which he laid the tiara in a dramatic gesture of humility and as a sign of the renunciation of human glory and power in keeping with the renewed spirit of the Council" (Wikipedia). Since that moment, no pope has resumed this centuries-old tradition. 

I think these things are absolutely stunning but I GUESS I can understand why they were discontinued.  The Church has bigger worries than having EPIC head wear for the Holy Father. Creating such a tiara would cost an unnecessary amount of money, unless you go the papier-mâché route like Blessed Pope John XXIII did... Anyways!! Back to the actual topic of this post: Pope Francis' Inauguration Mass!!

In typical Bernardi fashion, we woke up around 4:30 to be out the door by 5:00 am. In usual Brandon Miranda fashion, I woke up at 5:20 to leave with a group leaving at 5:30 am. The streets were empty but lines had already formed near St. Peter's Square to enter the papal Mass. The announcement was made the day before that only clergy, other denominations' leaders, world leaders, and seminarians will have seats if they were available. The laity would 100% be standing in the Square, unless of course you happened to be the Vice President of the United States or the former Speaker of the House...

As usual, we made our stop at the 24-hour bakery to get our cornetti fix. With two bombe and two ciambelle in hand, I was ready to face the day!! We arrive at the Square at around 6:15 for a 10:30 am Mass. Yes, we are that crazy.

We have a decent spot but the earlier group draws us to a closer spot behind barricades. I drank all my water and decided to go fill my bottle back up in the Square's center but discovered that I could not return to my group. The Swiss Guard stopped me and said in choppy English "no enter if no ticket." OKAY Swiss Guard. I just spent the last two hours sitting in your ticketed section which...SURPRISE!! There were no tickets for this event. I did what I learned from my father and started him down without moving in the slightest. HE tried to ignore me but eventual he turns and gestures for me to enter. VICTORY!!!

Before the Mass starts, Pope Francis comes out and greets the crowd. THE CROWD GOES WILD!!! People were running towards the barricades to try and get as close as they can to the Holy Father. As you have probably heard, he stopped and got off to kiss and blessed a disabled man in the crowd. It was evident that Pope Francis really cares about his flock. He embodies the Servant of the Servants of God!! Just as he came out to greet the crowd, he disappears back into the interior of the Square to prepare for Mass.

The Mass was great as always. With the readings in English and Spanish, I was able to understand the Word of God in languages I can comprehend. The Gospel was in Greek which was interesting but awesome!! All the ceremonial presentations of the papal vestments given to Pope Francis were beautiful. Everything was reverent and great. Seeing the Successor of St. Peter saying Mass for the second time since I've been in Rome was as grace filled as ever. I enjoyed every second and continued to fall deeper and deeper in love with the Church.

The time came for the Mass to end and it was clear to me that the Church will have some great years to come. Pope Francis will be our Holy Father for several decades hopefully and he will be the beacon of faith this world needs right now. This is the man that will inflame the hearts of many as he leads the Church on a path of holiness. His devotion to our Blessed Mother and to her son and our Savior Jesus Christ will hopefully inspire many to love them too. The future looks bright from my perspective.

"The walls of my town, they come crumbling down"

After some worries that this wasn't going to happen (though I was 100% in my mind), dreams became reality. Was I really here? And in FLORENCE? Yes. You may think I speak of a papal election (been there, done that) or something but no. I am at a Mumford and Sons concert...in Florence!!

I need to return to Florence because there is A TON of beautiful Renaissance Era artwork and world-renowned churches but the only thing I got around to doing was going to Mumford and napping. We stood in line for more hours than I can remember playing Ten Fingers and such other activities. At first, the crowd looked incredibly small for a Mumford and Sons concert then I remembered: I'm in Italy! No Italian actually shows up early for anything.

Once those gates opened to enter Nelson Mandela Forum, it was the purest of all chaos. People were full on sprinting towards the Forum. I had twisted my ankle before Pope Emeritus Benedict's last audience so running and me don't get along at the moment. Luckily, I had Emily Brom in wedge heeled boots running with me at my speed :)

We had quite an international crowd with us in that Forum. Chants of "Moom-Faird" arose and it took me a couple of seconds to realize they were trying to say Mumford. It was a typical concert environment so not exactly a fount of holy example but whatever!! I didn't expect anything more from a Mumford and Sons concert! The transcendent experience will kick in when those four men hit the stage and do what they do.  

The first opening act to hit the stage was Jesse Quin, who was very folky and from the UK. I felt bad for him because the crowd was just talking over his set and he wasn't very loud. From what I heard, he sounded good but I won't be hearing me play his music on KUST. He has very calming music and I am already tired from standing in line. I don't want to fall asleep for if he keeps playing, I'll be out cold before Mumford hits the stage!! But I will give him a second chance via iTunes to see if I change my mind.

The second opening act was Deap Vally, a Los Angeles based band of two INSANE women who were drinking straight hard liquor on stage. When I say these women were crazy, that is an understatement on my part. Any ounce of tiredness in me was pounded out by the blaring rock music that poured forth from the amps. These women, as crazy and psychotic as they make have been, were extremely talented. I will most definitely play them on KUST if Emily lets me. They were a riot but the crowd started getting antsy and started to beg for Mumford to come out while they were playing. These women just drank more and carried on.

 Finally, Mumford and Sons hit the stage and went straight to it by opening with "Babel", which got the crowd pumped for every second to follow. If you are interest here is the setlist:

1. Babel
2. I Will Wiat
3. Whispers in the Dark
4. White Blank Page
5. Holland Road
6. Timshel
7. Little Lion Man
8. Lover of the Light
9. Thistle & Weeds
10. Ghosts That We Knew
11. Hopeless Wanderer
12. Roll Away Your Stone
13. Dust Bowl Dance
14. Where Are You Now?
15. Winter Winds
16. The Cave

Aside from the drunk/high crowd and the constant pushing and the sardine packed space and the shouts that were singing along, the concert was AMAZING!! Mumford and Sons are truly musicians and have a gift that few possess. I think an outdoor venue would have served the environment better but I take what I get and appreciate it!! I'd suggest to anyone I meet to try and see Mumford and Sons live because they are truly something else.

As the night continued on, we walked out in peace and happiness that Mumford and Sons had just performed a wonderful concert. It's moments like these that I will remember for the rest of my life.

Photo Credit: Emily Pohl

HABEMUS PAPAM!!

Earlier last week, Fr. Carola had announced at our community dinner that if we did not have a pope by the night of our community night on Wednesday, we will move our gathering to the Square where we will most likely be praying for the cardinals as black smoke would rise for a third time. All of us in Bernardi had one wish for the upcoming week: PLEASE let it be Wednesday night when the new Holy Father is elected.

Everyone was getting ready throughout the house to prepare for our short trek to the Square. The lay people are bundling up as the seminarians are weather-proofing their cassocks and I am dragging my feet because I am always one to wait until the last minute to do things and old habits die hard. Greg Billion and I went off to the Square with plans of meeting up with some of his friends and chilling with them as we await the smoke. As I said, there wasn't much of an expectation for a pope to be elected that night so we were not watching the chimney intently like last time.

That's when it happened. As we heard the usual "Ohhhhh...." rising from the crowd, we looked at the chimney and saw it was the usual grey color before the real color starts coming through. I thought, "Alright. It's going to turn black now. Or now. It is going to turn black. Why isn't that smoke turning black?! OH MY GOSH WE HAVE A POPE!!!!" After some jumping up and down with those around we, we full sprinted towards the facade of St. Peter's so we can get closer to the window. Everyone was singing and laughing and crying and cheering out of pure joy. Habemus Papam!!

In our sheer excitement, the question arose in our minds: who is our next Holy Father? We all sat there and heard rumors circulating within the crowd. Reporters were swarming and asking who we thought the cardinals chose. It's moments like these where I am glad I'm surrounded by solid Catholics because you'll only hear one response from us: Whoever the Holy Spirit chooses, I'm happy with him. Soon we had the cardinal come out and announce the name of the cardinal...

You may not know this about me but I'm not exactly an expert in Latin. Did he say George? The only cardinal named George that I know is from Chicago but that is highly unlikely. But did he say Francis? Now I'm just confused. 

The international crowd had a hard time trying to communicate within ourselves to discuss what we just heard. As you can probably suspect, I was not surrounded by people versed in Latin so we tried to decipher the name he took as pope. At first I heard Gregory but then I knew definitively the real answer. Slowly rising from the crowd, I heard the Roman flock chanting quietly at first but it grew louder and louder as everyone joined in. "Francesco! Francesco!! Francesco..." At that moment, I understood that Pope Francis will be walking out to address his flock. Then I heard he was from Argentina? Well that's sick!! I would love him regardless of where he was from but he's Latino? ¡¡Gracias a Dios!! That is just a cherry atop this papal sundae!! 

Then the moment finally came...

No video, no news coverage, no article can truly represent how everyone felt in that Square. This man has something about him that you can sense by simply being in his presence. Again, I can tell you more about this when I retell this story over and over again but I don't have much else to say in writing! 

Jorge Mario Cardinal Bergoglio was elevated on March 13, 2013 to be the 266th Holy Father of the Holy Catholic Church and took the name Francis, making him the first pope to take that name. And I was there to witness this from resignation of Benedict XVI through Sede Vacante through Conclave and now this. I am so undeserving of all these graces and blessing from being present here but God chose to send me to Rome for this. 

Viva il Papa!! Viva Papa Francesco!!

In the Time of Conclave and Smoke

The hype on the streets of Rome proceeding the Conclave?? The Next Pope's cassocks are on display!! Wait...

Yes, I'm not kidding you. People were crowding around this storefront window to look at cassocks. Not something you see everyday!! Even reporters from around the world were doing stories on this garments  I ran into a reporter from Los Angeles who said, I quote: "This is the closest some will ever get to a pope in their lifetime." I'm sorry sir. If you are in Rome, it is easier to get tickets to a papal audience than it is to get a flat screen on Black Friday. If looking at these cassocks is the closest experience you will have with a pope, you must be in Rome for the wrong reason!! Anyway, back to Conclave news...

As we arrived at the Square for the Conclave Opening Mass, I noticed a new addition to the facade of the Basilica: the red curtains!! In a matter of days, out next Holy Father will be walking out of that window and we can scream the phrase that is on the tongue of every Catholic in the world: HABEMUS PAPAM. 

It is roughly 8 a.m. but I am excited for this Mass to begin. I have come to terms that Pope Emeritus Benedict is no longer our Holy Father but now I have a new thing to come to terms with. As all the Cardinal-Electors process in for Mass, I realized that one of these men will be elevated to the Throne of St. Peter. I am in the same room as the next Holy Father and I have no idea who the Holy Spirit will pick. CATHOLIC CLIFFHANGER!!!

Cardinal Dolan. Gotta love him!!

As usual, the Mass was very reverent and holy. The readings were in English and Spanish so that got me excited!! The offertory petitions were in some crazy languages like Arabic and Swahili. The universal Church under one roof!! All of this was going too exciting to handle! I could not go another day without hearing someones name in the Eucharistic prayer. The whole "for the Order of Bishops" was just not cutting it for. I want a pope!! And luckily for me, I will have one soon.

I was in the Square when the first ballot was burned. Even though I knew it was highly unlikely that they would have a pope this early on, I was still antsy. As you will come to know when I tell my stories in greater detail, my faith blossomed even more when that black smoke came out of the chimney. All of this was happening and now the Church is completely in the hands of God. I am pleasantly awaiting the days to follow!!

Holy Mary, Mother of God, pray for us sinners now and at the hour of our death. 

Sede Vacante

I never thought I would be here for this but the Lord has a different plan for me and all of us here on our pilgrimage in Rome. As of yesterday, February 28th, at 7:00 PM CET, Pope Benedict XVI, 265th Successor of St. Peter, has become Pope Emeritus, a title we have not seen in over 600 years. To be honest, it is kind of awkward to know that our formal Holy Father is has stepped down to make way for whoever the Church needs at this moment. I have no doubt that Benedict is following the will of God, but I would be lying if I said I was not saddened by this all.

Papal portholes at St. Paul Outside the Wall

Since his announcement on February 11th, I really hadn't felt like much of this was real. I remember the day that Pope Benedict was announced back in 2005 and I grew to love him as my faith grew. He was the pope during my reversion. He was the pope as I grew into spiritual maturity. The thought that he was no longer going to be the Supreme Pontiff was far from setting in. To think that soon another another man's face will fill the porthole to the left of Benedict soon. Was any of this possible?

I have been here for almost a month and I have already experienced the joy he brings to his flock. People are happy to see him as he waves out to the crowds at his audiences. He has inspired so many to pick up the torch of faith and set the world on fire with the love of Christ. I attended his last audience and it did not feel like this was REALLY the last time we would see him on that stage tending to his flock. 

Image from Charlotte Observer

It wasn't until we went to the Square to prayer Vespers and a rosary at the clock struck 7pm that things started to get real. After being interviewed by a reporter in Spanish by a reporter from Nicaragua (whole story in itself), I went off to pray and soon we were surrounded my reporters snapping pictures of us. We were also joined by many people passing by who hesitantly approached us and nervously joined us as we prayed the rosary. As our candles burned on, a crowd had formed around us mostly in prayer. As we knelt on the ground and heard Fr. Carola read Benedict's last statement from Castel Gandolfo, it was about time. I will never forget the tolling of those bells. At every toll, reality started to hit me one brick at a time. We all started to chant the Salve Regina as the bells continued to toll. We no longer have a man to call pope.

We have officially entered Sede Vacante, or Vacant See. The Church is without a Holy Father.

Pray for us O Holy Mother of God, that we may be made worthy of the promises of Christ.